Punitive Solstice

The punitive assignment of a couple of external ‘management communication’ workshops is the latest folly imposed by a hapless ‘management’ that has no clue I’ve been teaching and facilitating such things across 20 countries. Deeply cynical and utterly oblivious to its own gaping flaws regarding humane and engaged leadership, its days are self-numbered. Trump-like, this ‘manager’ is a fount of narcissistic tendencies that reflect on Others the most self-possessed of gaping flaws.

My days there are self-numbered as well. What to do to maximize? meh. That’s the wrong question. Simply occupying the transitory instance of Life provides a low-frequency drone that accompanies the blood-pulse in ear: always there until it is not. Easy to be so distracted by the vicissitudes of existence that the pulse falls away from consciousness, bringing it back to the fore even while fully immersed in any activity. Burning up days that are never to be retrieved is the original sin. But it’s not about maximizing, it’s about be-ing within every moment. Every second.

I’ve segued into a state of mind that sees its own limits, looming, in reflections that now, seen close-up, fill the eyes with impending blindness. These are limits that Life imposes. Spirit might forefend them temporarily, then transcend or perhaps succumb to another line of existence. Or not. The expansive intentions that drove earlier Life have transformed into mere survival, seeing daily cycles as hurdles to overcome, all the while, watching evidence of life flicker, inverted on scarlet retina. Listening for blood-pulse.

Complex tasks are avoided because that meditative listening falls too far away. And Life becomes mere mechanical functioning: fixing this, buying that, eating food prepared by machines, not watching the stars, silently, motionfull within cosmic chaos.

Full dissertation text: The Regime of Amplification

Well, I guess it’s about time to put the PhD dissertation text out there in .pdf form, so, here it is (PDF download):

The Regime of Amplification

Have at it, be polite, no grabbing, pushing, or shoving. Do not fold, spindle, or mutilate. If you can prove that you’ve read it back to front, I’ll buy you a bottle of Herradura Añejo Tequila*, as long as we can split it!

*this is my hard liquor drink of choice since 1980 when it was hard to find even in the US southwest — cherished bottles imported into Iceland (bought in NYC at NY Liquors on Canal Street, the only place in NYC that carried it!) would last up to six months, like a fine Scottish whiskey, small glasses for sipping — none of that brutish slugging down shots or making margaritas with this fine distillate.

various psychical states

I have supposed a Human being to be capable of various psychical states, with varying degrees of consciousness, as follows: (a) the ordinary state, with no consciousness of the presence of Fairies; (b) the eerie state, in which, while conscious of actual surroundings, he is also conscious of the presence of Fairies; (c) a form of trance, in which, while unconscious of actual surroundings, and apparently asleep, he (i.e. his immaterial essence) migrates to other scenes, in the actual world, or in Fairyland, and is conscious of the presence of Fairies.

Carroll, L., 1893, Sylvie and Bruno. MacMillan & Co., New York, NY.

There you have it! Who can resist Mr. Carroll’s fertile mind?

What state are you in?

yup

When the great earth, abandoning day, rolls up the deeps of the heavens and the universe, a new door opens for the human spirit, and there are few so clownish that some awareness of the mystery of being does not touch them as they gaze. For a moment of night we have a glimpse of ourselves and of our world islanded in its stream of stars – pilgrims of mortality, voyaging between horizons across eternal seas of space and time. Fugitive though the instant be, the spirit of man is, during it, ennobled by a genuine moment of emotional dignity, and poetry makes its own both the human spirit and experience.

. . .

Our fantastic civilization has fallen out of touch with many aspects of nature, and with none more completely than with night. Primitive folk, gathered at a cave mouth round a fire, do not fear night; they fear, rather, the energies and creatures to whom night gives power; we of the age of the machines, having delivered ourselves of nocturnal enemies, now have a dislike of night itself. With lights and ever more lights, we drive the holiness and beauty of night back to the forests and the sea; the little villages, the crossroads even, will have none of it. Are modern folk, perhaps, afraid of night? Do they fear that vast serenity, the mystery of infinite space, the austerity of stars? Having made themselves at home in a civilization obsessed with power, which explains its whole world in terms of energy, do they fear at night for their dull acquiescence and the pattern of their beliefs? Be the answer what it will, to-day’s civilization is full of people who have not the slightest notion of the character or the poetry of night, who have never even seen night. Yet to live thus, to know only artificial night, is as absurd and evil as to know only artificial day.

Beston, H., 1976. The outermost house: a year of life on the Great Beach of Cape Cod, Harmondsworth, NY: Penguin.

the dorsal turn

As readily as one accepts the status of artistic creation, as a paradigm for human production, in terms of a terrestrial afterlife — the desire to leave something behind — so might we insist that the artifact functions as archive and memory bank. And the same might be said of technological invention in general, for, as has often been pointed out, the word tekhne was used in Greek as much for what was produced as art as what was manufactured; it stands for the artisanal all the way from art to industry. Although the relation to memory and to archivation might not be immediately apparent in the case of a rudimentary tool, it can be understood that whatever is produced as nonorganic or “nonbiodegradable” remainder will necessarily constitute some form of memorial trace. And it is an obvious fact that artifactual technologies such as language, especially via writing, consist precisely in what Bernard Stiegler refers to as the exteriorization of memory, and that the contemporary technologies of information amount to a veritable “industrialization of memory.” If technology is a matter of exteriorization, of the human reaching outside itself (but, as was argued regarding corticalization and the upright stance, in a way that calls into question the integrity of any interiority), then it is also a matter of archivation: what is created outside the human remains as a matter of record and increasingly becomes the very record or archive, the artificial or exterior memory itself. The production of an artifact is the production of an archive; it means depositing in the present- in some “present” — an object, which, as it inserts and catalogs itself in the past, will become available for a future retrieval.

In reaching outside itself, the human therefore reaches both forward and back; in seeming to turn away from the past, it leaves the artificial that will have it forever referring back to that constructed past as the trace of its memory, as promise of artificial memory and promise or threat, eventually, of artificial intelligence. Memory might be called, after all, the first artificial intelligence, and it comes to be recognized explicitly as such once Freud discovers the unconscious like some self-produced biochip that controls (and derails), as if from behind, the conscious. The life of memory, its status as alive or dead, internal or external, real or artificial, draws the fault line along which the question of technology is still debated, from the desirability of “replacing” mental functions by machines (oral histories by writing, arithmetic by calculators, spelling by word processors, to begin with) all the way to nanoscientific cerebral implants and the manipulation of genetic memory systems.

Wills, D., 2008. Dorsality: thinking back through technology and politics, Minneapolis, MN: University of Minnesota Press.

Roy’s vision

Interconnectedness raises an important issue regarding the connectivity of new media art––simply put, between what fields might interconnectedness lie? How might the internal information system of networked photons interface with the external information network of our telematic planet? Art embraces the central concepts and features of the new biophysics: coherence, macroscopic quantum states, long-range interactions, non-linearity, self-organization and self-regulation, communication networks, field models, interconnectedness, non-locality and the inclusion of consciousness. Indeed, these attributes relate to the canon of interactive art, the five-fold path of connectivity, immersion, interaction, transformation and emergence. This path relates to the shamanic path to immersion in the spiritual domain, where interaction with psychic entities is the means, transformation of consciousness is the goal and the emergence of new knowledge the outcome.

Ascott, R., 2006. Technoetic Pathways toward the Spiritual in Art: A Transdisciplinary Perspective on Connectedness, Coherence and Consciousness. Leonardo, 39(1), pp.65–69.

not to be overlooked . . .

Following on to examine the trend in cosmology and unified field theories, Chalmers speculates that conscious experience may be a fundamental feature cosmologically:

“If the existence of consciousness cannot be derived from physical laws, a theory of physics is not a true theory of everything. So a final theory must contain an additional fundamental component. Toward this end, I propose that conscious experience be considered a fundamental feature, irreducible to anything more basic.”

This perception of the central nature of consciousness to the cosmological description is more acute than an academic or philosophical matter. Although the scientific description is based exclusively on the objective physical universe, our contact with reality is entirely sine qua non through our subjective conscious experience. From birth to death, we experience only a stream of consciousness through which all our experience of the physical world is gained. All scientific experiments performed on the physical world ultimately become validated by the subjective conscious experience of the experimenters, and the subsequent witnesses to the phenomena and conclusions. — Chris King

King, C., 2006. Quantum Cosmology and the Hard Problem of the Conscious Brain. In J. Tuszynski, ed. The Emerging Physics of Consciousness. New York, NY: Springer.

first at something…

well, made to the top of one list, for a change, and not on a ‘most wanted’ one with profiles from my bad side. averaging 48 km/month, I jumped in front of the next highest person (gal) on the Lap-it-up campaign at the uni Sports Centre. that’s 48 km of swimming for the month. it’s been relatively easy, but it’s a chlorinated pool system, so I develop what my Boulder students labeled the “Einstein Effect” with my poor hair. oh well. I’ll cut it all off again before heading to summer climes anyway.

anything to avoid the prospect of facing the act of writing: it’s a bane right now. and social life, remote and local, is sadly lacking. can’t seem to organize anything of a balance between the two. it’s all or nothing in tracking what the Self determines as important. versus cashing in on material bulwarks. and anyways:

We see then that the deepest problems are often found in the study of what seems obvious, because the “obvious” is frequently merely a notion that summarizes the invariant features of a certain domain of experience which has become habitual and the basis of which has dropped out of consciousness. — David Bohm

Distance versus Desire :: Clearing the ElectroSmog

The desire to transcend distance and separation has accompanied the history of media technology for many centuries. Various attempts to realize the demand for a presence from a distance have produced beautiful imaginaries such as those of tele-presence and ubiquity, the electronic cottage and the re-invigoration of the oikos, and certainly not least among them the reduction of physical mobility in favor of an ecologically more sustainable connected life style. As current systems of hyper-mobility are confronted with an unfolding energy crisis and collide with severe ecological limits – most prominently in the intense debate on global warming – citizens and organizations in advanced and emerging economies alike are forced to reconsider one of the most daring projects of the information age: that a radical reduction of physical mobility is possible through the use of advanced tele-presence technologies.

ElectroSmog and the quest for a sustainable immobility

The ElectroSmog festival for sustainable immobility, staged in March 2010 [1], was both an exploration of this grand promise of tele-presence and a radical attempt to create a new form of public meeting across the globe in real-time. ElectroSmog tried to break with traditional conventions of staging international public festivals and conferences through a set of simple rules: No presenter was allowed to travel across their own regional boundaries to join in any of the public events of the festival, while each event should always be organized in two or more locations at the same time. To enable the traditional functions of a public festival, conversation, encounter, and performance, physical meetings across geographical divides therefore had to be replaced by mediated encounters.

The festival was organized at a moment when internet-based techniques of tele-connection, video-telephony, visual multi-user on-line environments, live streams, and various forms of real-time text interfaces had become available for the general public, virtually around the globe. No longer an object of futurology ElectroSmog tried to establish the new critical uses that could be developed with these every day life technologies, especially the new breeds of real-time technologies. The main question here was if a new form of public assembly could emerge from the new distributed space-time configurations that had been the object of heated debates already for so many years?
more “Distance versus Desire :: Clearing the ElectroSmog”

work, labor, action

Arendt‘s tripartite approach to the sociopolitical — Work, Labor, Action — in “The Human Condition” suggests the expenditure or the flow of energy. All three are intertwined within the do-ing, the be-ing of life, and in the sense that they are all embodied expressions of life-energy, they are equal, divided only by the particularities of the pathways of expression of those energies. She begins, I believe correctly, with viva activa as her source: the active, activated life. However, she does not explicitly posit a connection between viva activa and the source of the possibility for an active lif, that is: ones life-energy (sourced in the energized thermodynamic flows of life itself). These impulses towards the social structures of collective life must have a source, an activated well-spring that drives the cumulative social (and life) dynamic. The question of the source is perhaps more important than the ultimate expression of the source.
more “work, labor, action”

Empty Infinity

Without beginning, without end,
Without past, without future.
A halo of light surrounds the world of the law.
We forget one another, quiet and pure, altogether powerful and empty.
The emptiness is irradiated by the light of the heart and of heaven.
The water of the sea is smooth and mirrors the moon in its surface.
The clouds disappear in blue space; the mountains shine clear.
Consciousness reverts to contemplation; the moon’s disk rests alone.

Wilhelm, R., 1962. The Secret of the Golden Flower: A Chinese Book of Life, New York, NY: Harvest / HBJ Book.

Researching more of Wilhelm’s powerful translation work that continues to widen an opening door into an ultimately livable space. The dorsal/ventral (toku – nin or Circulation of Light) breathing technique elucidated here — even when practiced with flawed concentration — has an immediate and profound affect on the state of the system. I am even surprised with the intensity of change which ensues. The body is straighter, uplifted, and the balance of body heat has shifted drastically — the chronically over-heated head is cooler, the feet and hands warmer. This shift has not yet directly impacted rising gall (yang) in surprise (reactive) situations, but when the breathing becomes first nature, it appears to have the potential to do that. The base-line of calm has shifted for the better. Will have to consult Heiji about these affects. A daily practice of some minutes, with as many reminders shot through the many unconscious moments of non-breathing, seems to be an auspicious start. There is no going back on this discovered knowledge.

Sydney Non-Objective Gallery exhibition

[ed: An excerpt of neoscenes::drift was recently included in the Sydney Non-Objective Catalogue and CD 2005-2010, SNO Gallery, Sydney, AU, 2010 (gallery catalog and audio CD) ISBN 978-0-9805877-3-9, Mar 2010]

reflections on neoscenes :: drift

lost in a maelstrom of sonic simulations and stimulations, re-collected, re-presented, via various creato-destructive algorithmic methodologies, drift moves through many post-cartesian spaces and through several parallel universes. depending on your frame of reference you may follow a similar path. or you may not. drift demands relativity and provides quantum realism.


(01:00:00, stereo audio, 115 mb)

blurb for SNO gallery exhibition web site, November 2009, NSW, Australia:

drift arises from an ordered archive of ambient phonographic fragments recorded over the past twenty years or so. From this archive improvisational works are assembled: indeterminate and reductive modulations that critically sample the flow of embodied be-ing. Known objects and discrete events populate our world only because we are social animals who have learned the dominant protocols of the techno-social system that we inhabit. This condition is especially onerous with the protocols circumscribing the failed (object-oriented) materialist worldview. drift consciously moves algorithmically with-in and with-out of recognizable protocols, acknowledging that without these memory-impressed protocols, all immediate experience becomes an incomprehensible flow. However, the cosmos we participate in, and indeed, are part of, is composed of these flows and comprehension is an illusion. What we know is only the temporal persistence of patterns in our embodied consciousness which resonate with an attenuated selection of those flows. drift simulates the full signal width of the flows, recognizable or not, and simply transits the field which is the present.

more “Sydney Non-Objective Gallery exhibition”

resonance, matter, and poetry

I wake up this morning remembering spatial plans for grocery stores in Prescott, Arizona, and then, one in Kiel and another two in Berlin, Germany. As I started to think about it, after a few minutes, I came up with (mental) spatial maps for more than 50 different food stores in ten countries. Small segments of an enormous set of spatially-framed memories of tens of thousands of situations passed through. Repetition of exposure is more likely to create and lock those memories into recall-ready be-ing. It is what structure and structured situations impress onto the embodied life. The access to these memories arises as a sequence of resonant flows across consciousness. As mindfulness scans a region of mind, resonances appear as bright spots of particular order in a dim background. Resonance is a fundamental indication of higher or concentrated energy states. Fundamental quantization of resonance will cause distributed peaks and troughs in the strength of resonance. The subtlety of resonance guides our movement through the flows around us.

(Who cares?)

Does it matter that dominant views exist? Does it matter that humans are faced with a decision to submit to those views or not? To matter is probably the wrong question, because matter locks us into one view to begin with.

How to transcend the rigidity of extant protocol? Opposition is no cure. Poetry is perhaps one pathway, poetic stretching, morphing of the protocol.

Poetry. The Prose Edda, especially the Skáldskaparmál comes to mind, Snorri’s guide to the forms and language of the Saga, and the process of kenning or naming the objects of that world. Imagine making such a device for covering the territory of inquiry. It brings up the text sketched, though later scrapped, for the Hybrid Spaces workshop: The Hybrid: This and/or That. Could be a useful source for later on…

what is

what is is movement. Actually what tends to make it difficult for us to work in terms of this notion is that we usually think of movement in the traditional way as an active relationship of what is and what is not. — David Bohm

This gets to a core condition — all is movement: movement/motion is creative (including our consciousness). It also suggests that a redirection of that movement is not really possible, as redirection itself as a concept is simply the mapping relative to a Cartesian or other reductive framework. That is, unless the redirection is thought of as a (the) outcome of processional (negentropic) attenuation of flows caused by life. Which suggests that life itself is essentially creative, an obvious linguistic tautology. But life, as a general phenomena, affects a wide range of arbitrarily specified flows (flows that can be viewed in a traditionally categorized way as being different). By this I mean that in addition to the base (chemical) energy conversion mechanisms that govern most life forms there are a vast, subtle, and complex array of expressions of these processes which biochemists have been slowly teasing out, but never reaching a finality on at all. Whatever the case, the flows can be said to follow more or less explicit pathways (although our traditional view of these pathways is largely informed by mechanistic understanding and reductive framing. It is also such that it is our implicate consciousness, our full and immediate apprehension of the phenomena that we sense, is part of that originary what is.

Memory is the prime example of the persistence of a pathway of flow. It is precisely the persistence that allows us to move through the world without each successive moment being a surprising cacophony of unpredicted and unrecognizable sensory impressions. While at the same time, memory is itself, as an element of consciousness, implicate to what is being circumscribed.

The process of thought is not, however, merely a representation of the manifest world; rather it makes an important contribution to how we experience this world, for, as we have already pointed out earlier, this experience is a fusion of sensory information with the replay of some of the content of memory (which latter contains thought built into its very form and order). — David Bohm

Weltanschauung

The construction of a worldview is a process of feedback, memory, and resonance with that memory arising out of an awareness of difference.

We know remarkably little about the ground functions of practically the entire system we are embedded within.

Writing an idiosyncratic worldview oscillates between the interior and exterior of being. It moves through all culture and social systems, the natural world, and every code encoded, every text ever written. To this passage is mixed lived impression, the accumulate energized traces that life leaves on the body — traces that, ultimately, are memory. And through memory, life compares these two strands: difference arises.

Traces of word and traces of where and when word arrived into the body-system: spoken, written, the two means to no end. Each in arrangement, in relation with an Other, Others. The relation to the Other defined by inarticulate resonance framed and directed into word, and left as traces both embodied and those dis-embodied, change left behind as bodies pass by. more “Weltanschauung”

48-Stunden Neukoellen 2009 : flickering wastelands III

A special live/streamed event, radio aporee presents flickering wastelands III in its long-standing open-house tradition. good foods, good sounds, good people. part of the 48-Stunden-(Berlin-)Neukölln Kunst und Kulturfestival. neoscenes, fresh back from many weeks on the road in the Rocky Mountains of Colorado and in the Sonoran Desert of Arizona will take you, with hydrocarbons flaring, on a drifting trajectory through spaces that dwell restlessly between ears and leave traces of soot, soil, and water (listen below!). more “48-Stunden Neukoellen 2009 : flickering wastelands III”

Riverwalking

Moore knows rivers, wet places, how to feel, how to transliterate feelings, and how to see, but I’m not in consonance with her characterization of the desert. Drawing emotion onto those landscapes seems to place the human over that which is not known — as though it could be humanly known. Something like the common personification of animals and the position of pets in the human social system. The desert is a transform mapping of the Void. Why personify that? Seems corrupt to add human stuff(ing) onto it.

Sometimes, in a desert landscape, a landscape without consciousness, emptier of intellect than any other landscape I have ever seen, I think I can feel emotion lying like heat on the surface of the sand and seeping into the cracks between boulders. There is joy in the wind that blows through the spines of the saguaro, and fear in bare rocks. Anger sits waiting under stones. Exhilaration pools in the low places, the dry river beds, the cracked arroyos, and is sucked by low pressure ridges up into storm clouds that blow east toward the Alamo Canyon.

Moore, K.D., 1996. Riverwalking : reflections on moving water, San Diego, CA: Harcourt Brace.

Randy Olson

(00:56:52, stereo audio, 109.2 mb)

attend a screening last night of Randy Olson’s Flock of Dodos at the RagTag Cinema in Columbia. he was in attendance. and again this morning, he gave a presentation for science academics at the university as a part of their Darwin Days (where the Chair of the Life Sciences Department pointed out they were not allowed to say “celebration” but rather “commemoration”). the film’s premise was to map out the way both sides of the evolution/creationist divide are communicating and presenting their POV to the public. scientists are shown to be poor communicators, creationists shown to be poor communicators except for some who know the value of style and appearance (the Discovery Institute being the chief antagonists posing as a non-partisan think-tank). they are the ones leading the issues. in the same way Republicans have been successful in constructing the narratives guiding the story-following population to the conservative Nirvana. Olson, a former Harvard PhD biologist transitioned to Hollywood via a degree at USC’s film school. he now tells stories that bridge the divide between science and the general public. but the leap from stories to action — stories that form a context for action — well, there is generally a passivity that is a condition of listening/watching a story recitation. listening to stories has to stop at some point. so, the story has to have a transitional mechanism leading to action. how does that work? telling a story and have action arise out of the exchange of energies. the attentive focus of absorbing a story transforming into world-changing action. in the evening Nick and I catch the screening of Sizzle also by Olson. overheard today:

mass media is directed at the pelvic floor, but what about having Kegels for Consciousness…?

later a repaired drum appears, as does a Tibetan singing bowl, and a basket full of instruments. resonant sound-making ensues.

solstice

Transmediale09 tasks start to form up. Though the decision to go to Berlin is not made quite yet. I can participate to a degree without going, working as a remote online moderator for the conference.

Winter Solstice about over and gone. To stretch days to June 21. No problem with that. Here sunrise was at 07:33 and sunset at 17:23. Not bad, day hardly shrinks from summer when the nights are still long and dark.

As the basement chill grows. It’ll be long underwear here. With no sunshine. Star shine tonight, perhaps sun tomorrow. I’ll watch the sun come up. The windows are warped in most the house. One way or the other. Gap at the bottom of the big one facing south. When the Pacific storms come ripping through both that window and the western one over the guest bed leaks a bit. Will have to see if I can effect a fix. Reading Thoreau. And others.

I do not regret my not having seen this before, since I now saw it under circumstances so favorable. I was in just the frame of mind to see something wonderful, and this was a phenomenon adequate to my circumstances and expectation and it put me on the alert to see more like it. I exulted like “a pagan suckled in a creed” that had never been worn at all, but was bran new, and adequate to the occasion. I let science slide, and rejoiced in that Light as if it had been a fellow creature. I saw that it was excellent, and was very glad to know that it was so cheap. A scientific explanation, as it is called, would have been altogether out of place there. That is for pale daylight. Science with its retorts would have put me to sleep; it was the opportunity to be ignorant that I improved. It suggested to me that there was something to be seen if one had eyes.

It made a believer of me more than before. I believed that the woods were not tenantless, but choke-full of honest spirits as good as myself any day — not an empty chamber, but an inhabited house — and for a few moments I enjoyed fellowship with them. Your so-called wise man goes trying to persuade himself that there is no entity there but himself and his traps, but it is a great deal easier to believe the truth. It suggested, too, that the same experience always gives birth to the same sort of belief or religion. One revelation has been made to the Indian, another to the white man. I have much to learn of the Indian, nothing from the missionary. I am not sure but all that would tempt me to teach the Indian my religion would be his promise to teach me his. Long enough I had heard of irrelevant things; now at length I was glad to make acquaintance with the Light that dwells in rotten wood. Where is all your knowledge gone to? It evaporates completely, for it has no depth. — Hank Thoreau

thesis proposal :: Background

Background for Research

While individual human presence in this world has fundamental repercussions on be-ing, it is the ever-present and synergistic exchange between humans — forming what I call a “continuum of relation” — that governs much of life. This energetic field of human relation is sometimes fraught with difficulties and complications in spite of the rich and necessary dynamic it brings to life. Technology, as a ubiquitous factor in mediating human relation, often dominates while presented as providing the only opportunity for mediated connection and interaction between humans.

Presence, as apprehended by the Other, circumscribes a range of sensory inputs that require energy (from the Self) to stimulate and drive. The efficacy and sustainability of human connection builds on the very real and tangible transmissions and receptions of energy between the Self and the Other. An interconnected plurality of dialectic human relation may be described as a network. These networks, made up of a web of Self-Other connections form the base fabric of the continuum of relation. Technology appears in these networks as the mediating pathway that is the carrier of energy from node to node, person to person. Technological systems also appear to apply absolute restraints on and attenuation of the idiosyncratic flows inherent in that continuum of relation. The discrete objects that populate the (technological) landscape of the continuum of relation and that modulate the character of communications are literally artifacts of a materialist point of view. A primary assumption in my research is that a materialist or mechanistic view of the world no longer suffices to adequately circumscribe the phenomena occurring within the continuum of relation. more “thesis proposal :: Background”

wacky yachts

Meeting life, being submerged in its flow remains only a goal. Like breathing. Where a developed consciousness of breathing becomes a stabilizing influence on the extremes of condition that impress the body and the soul as night turns to day and day following transitions to night.

By the same author of Where Are the Customers’ Yachts?, Andrea passes this wacky niblet (below) along. The yacht question is incredibly germane in the situation these days when a vast swath of the population still takes hits on the market (is foolish to listen to dullards/brokers) and then calculates for a few seconds in some small cavity in brain why the brokers still have the yachts, but then passes over any clear thought in order to stay up with discussions about lipstick in the national election. sheesh.

Wacky had plenty of other stuff too. He had different shells that he had found himself when he visited the seashore. Some of them had been on the beach, but some of them he had got out of almost two feet of water, which meant that when he had reached down for them, he had nearly had to put his nose in the water, because you have to take those chances if you want to get something valuable. The snail shells made a sound quite like the ocean, and the clam shells were going to be useful to keep collar buttons in as soon as he got old enough to wear collar buttons.

He had only one college pennant, but it was of the Colorado School of Mines, which is a college where they teach you to dig. Mr. Wallaby said that was more than they taught you in other colleges, so he wouldn’t need any other pennants. — Fred Schwed, Jr., “Wacky, The Small Boy,” 1939

náttúra

Just away from the Björk and Sigur Rós náttúra event in Laugardalur. Chilled to the bone from standing for the last five hours up stage front. Damn Nikon battery went dead right upon arrival. (flickr shots); did some audio recording, but the wind was pretty blustery, so most of those samples will be useless, methinks. But maybe some short cuts or a remix piece. Never met Loki and the others, he didn’t want to come over before the show started, so I left the house to catch Ghostigital with Finnbogi Pétursson doing an two hour ambient remix performance under the name: that was okay. The whole event was so-so. Sigur Rós cranked through a 90-minute set with some interesting covers of previous work, and played well despite the chill, but frankly, the music seemed repetitive in a concert setting, compared to having an iTunes collection on shuffle play with a mix of experimental-slash-pop. There was a little electricity when Björk joined in one song as a drummer (a tentative one at that!). The smoke from the smoke machines just blew away. That’s what the energy felt like, it blew sideways away, towards the big LED screen where those not down front could see the artists close-up.

Náttúra concert, Sigur Rós, Reykjavík, Iceland, June 2008

(00:11:59, stereo audio, 28.8 mb)

more Sigur Rós
(00:10:06, stereo audio, 24.3 mb)

some Björk:
(00:18:15, stereo audio, 43.8 mb)

And the next day’s newspaper noted that the entire park where the concert was held was completely filled with trash — bottles, cans, garbage everywhere: so much for the consciousness-raising aspect of the concert. People still seem to believe in some kind of remote ‘nature’ out there somewhere. Theoretical and not containing the Self as an extension. Or not even an extension, but simply part of it. period. Until there is a deep understanding of that, nothing will change.

stories

I break down and have (huh?) to buy Loki a copy of the Harry Potter book (uff, even writing the name here is annoying). Why? Because each summer for the past however many that have been a target for the marketing of Rowling’s tale, someone — me on several occasions — has gotten him the latest installment for an early birthday present for the first of his usual two or three birthday parties. He always has one party in Amurika, sometimes with cousin Lexie, though she’s not here now; used to be that Amma Lillian would make him a nice cake, too. Then, when he gets back to Iceland there is one party for his friends and then another one for the adults in his family. more “stories”

back to teaching

reading Stephen Brookfield’s two recent books on teaching — The Skillful Teacher, On Technique, Trust, and Responsiveness in the Classroom and The Power of Critical Theory, Liberating Adult Learning and Teaching along with Parker Palmer’s essays on education as a spiritual journey, To Know As We Are Known. might as well be girding for the rest of a career in education while job hunting. weak areas include the feedback process, especially the short-term-feedback processes to gauge how students are coping with the course at different levels. this doesn’t apply to the 2-week intensive workshops which have a constant level of dynamic feedback running the entire time. but the idea of having two online forum log-in ID’s for each student — one an assigned user ID (or self-selected user name) and the second being anonymously assigned (pull the user/password slip out of a hat at the beginning of the course) and used for posting reactions to the class situation. this can include both posed questions from myself as well as ad hoc discussions on subject material, procedures, processes, expectations, and outcomes.

part of me likes this idea, while part of me sees it as just another way of artificially coping with the chasm that has evolved over the years where the teacher and student start off their relationship not from a position of mutual trust, but of adversarial suspicion and imbalance. this largely because of the (de)formative pressures of the social system that sees education as a key element in the hegemonic production of consumables. nothing more. many now see ‘higher’ education as a mechanistic successor of primary education — where primary education was the social mechanism needed to produce people literate enough to perform as a worker in the industrial ‘revolution;’ higher education merely fills the role of producing ‘line’ workers for the information ‘revolution.’ uff!

Popular escapist fiction enchants adult readers without challenging them to be educated for critical consciousness. — bell hooks

Titans

Sam Harris on c-span. talking about blind spots of consciousness. solitary confinement. meditation needs to be brought into the normal spectrum of human experience. and this along with recalling the Challenger incident.

20 years since heading up from Tower Records near Columbia Circle to dinner at Emily’s mother and step-father’s place on the Upper West Side — sitting in the living room afterward — as the television played the Challenger explosion over and over. her step-father was VP at Martin Marietta, the company that built the solid-fuel Titan IV rocket boosters which exploded because of the thermally cracked o-ring. he spent most of the evening with his head in his hands as the spectacle looped endlessly. a few months later, I visited with Emily in Paris, here with tulips to be set

right here on the cold steam radiator.

then heading south to Lyon to visit with Christine and then to Chalon-sur-Saone for a week at the youth hostel and hanging out soaking up the ambience of Niepce.

Varela

Unless we accept that at this point in intellectual and scientific history that some radical re-learning is necessary, we cannot hope to move forward in the compulsive history of the ambivalent rejection-fascination with consciousness in philosophy of mind and cognitive science. My proposal implies that every good student of cognitive science who is also interested in issues at the level of mental experience, must inescapably attain a level of mastery in phenomenological examination in order to work seriously with first-person accounts. But this can only happen when the entire community adjusts itself to the corresponding acceptance of arguments, refereeing standards and editorial policies in major scientific journals, that can make this added competence an important dimension of a young researcher. To the long-standing tradition of objectivist science this sounds like anathema, and it is. But this is not a betrayal of science: it is a necessary extension and complement. Science and experience constrain and modify each other as in a dance. This is where the potential for transformation lies. It is also the key for the difficulties this position has found within the scientific community. It requires us to leave behind a certain image of how science is done, and to question a style of training in science which is part of the very fabric of our cultural identity. — Francisco Varela

yadda yadda

counterpointing Bateson’s eclectic digressions with Ronald Burt’s social systemics seems to point to a schizophrenic day of reading. Bateson clearly saw the dangers of the flows that power social systems, where Burt sees opportunity for command-and-control through semi-distributed systems. His view on ‘social capital’ is a mapping of positions for maximizing influence that this form of capital offers. Bordieu suggested the trinity of economic capital, cultural capital, and social capital, it is the latter that seemed to popularly circumscribe the most influential aspects of human relations. And as a way of mapping power, it floats to the surface of social consciousness.

The myth of power, is of course, a very powerful myth; and probably most people in this world more or less believe in it… But it is still epistemological lunacy and leads inevitably to all sorts of disaster… If we continue to operate in terms of a Cartesian dualism of mind versus matter, we shall probably also come to see the world in terms of God versus man; élite versus people; chosen race versus others; nation versus nation and man versus environment. It is doubtful whether a species having both an advanced technology and this strange way of looking at the world can endure…

The whole of our thinking about what we are and what other people are has got to be restructured. This is not funny, and I do not know how long we have to do it in. If we continue to operate on the premises that were fashionable during the Pre-Cybernetic era, and which were especially underlined during the Industrial Revolution, which seemed to validate the Darwinian unit of survival, we may have twenty or thirty years before the logical reductio ad absurdum of our old positions destroys us. Nobody knows how long we have, under the present system, before some disaster strikes us, more serious than the destruction of any group of nations. The most important task today is, perhaps, to learn to think in the new way. — Gregory Bateson

another oracle, or madman?

Partial Description of the World

I don’t normally post long passages of other writers, but Alan (Sondheim) posted this to nettime today: it penetrated the fog of hypo-texts that floods a typical day in front of screen-life.

The power grid provides 60 Hz here at approximately 115-117 volts; this is maintained by dynamos driven by steam or coal or oil or hydro held together in a malleable grid. The grid enters the city, where electricity is parceled out through substations to cables continuously maintained and repaired. Here, the cables are below ground. They drive my Japanese Zaurus PDA which utilizes an entire linux operating system on it. The Zaurus connects to the Internet through a wireless card that most often connects to my Linksys router, which is connected both to the power grid and the DSL modem by a cat cable. The DSL is operated by Verizon with its own grid at least nation-wide and continuously-maintained. The DSL of course connects more or less directly to the Internet, which is dependent upon an enormous number of protocol suites for its operation, the most prominent probably TCP/IP. The addresses of the Internet, through which I reach my goal of NOAA weather radar, are maintained by ICANN and other organizations. These organization are run by any number of people, who employ the Net, fax, telephone, and standard mail, to communicate world-wide. more “Partial Description of the World”

The Energy Dynamics of Technologically-Mediated Human Relation within Digital Telecommunications Networks

A proposal by John Hopkins for Doctoral Thesis research at the University of Bremen, Department of Computer Science (Informatiks) [editor’s note: this initial proposal never was submitted following the accident of 04 July 2005 that set life on another trajectory.]

1.0 Statement of Problem

1.1 Introductory note

Beginning with a series of broad general statements that converge to frame the trans-disciplinary space of my inquiry, I will move to proposals that are more specific. This approach is an important feature of the research itself — where the applicability and efficacy of a model is best challenged when looking from absolute specific cases to increasingly general situations and vice versa. In framing this essentially divergent research, I would suggest that the proposal first be considered as a whole — as I understand that the depth of my knowledge-base varies across some of the disciplinary spaces. more “The Energy Dynamics of Technologically-Mediated Human Relation within Digital Telecommunications Networks”

perturbing

VALIS (Vast Active Living Intelligence System): A perturbation in the reality field in which a spontaneous self-monitoring negentropic vortex is formed, tending progressively to subsume and incorporate its environment into arrangements of information. Characterized by quasi-consciousness, purpose, intelligence, growth and an armillary coherence. — Philip K. Dick

that’s no Internet!

fearlessness

the speed of religious innovation. words to wake up with from a sleep of a thousand dreams and groping around for the pathway. these two thoughts come to me: the despair I face is of my own making; and fearlessness is paramount. it is always this internal relation to the world, where change is framed as something accomplished by introspection, not in relation with the surrounding presence of spirit. although there should be no distinction between the internal spirit and the external spirit. they are One. but connection to that dynamic flow remains elusive and transitory in the confusing rush of noise that the social brings. (how this sounds an anti-social position, but this is not the case, merely to recognize the effect of social structures (as they enhance material survivability) on the individual.)

interstitial awareness, and Brakhage’s rise to the surface of my consciousness through meeting certain Others. the sheer animated viscerality of his expressions that so activated my fascination. the further individual creative expressions/projections can be stripped of the restrictions of abstracted and impressed social channeling, the closer the impulse comes to pure energy.

The light of power is waning. The eyes of individual subjectivity cannot adapt to mere holes in a mask, which are the eyes of those fog-bound in shared illusion. The individual’s point of view must prevail over false collective participation. In total self-possession, reach society with the tentacles of subjectivity and remake everything, starting with yourself. The reversal of perspective is what is positive in negativity, the fruit which will burst out of the old world’s bud. — Raoul Vaneigem

coal drift

second day of the workshop. hard to read the situation. everyone is in an unfamiliar environment. the ambiance in the place is calm. but hard to decode. we are strangers. landing from one planet to another. it is unusual for me to be sharing the direction of the workshop, or at least trying to. there is an internal process of deference, but that clearly is not collaboration, I need to retune myself. it is hard for me to find a balance because of this. on my part. waiting for the students to make the 0900 morning start request to appear after losing most of the first day to stragglers who arrived late into the evening. there is a lack of awareness of the meta-structural social dynamics that would facilitate a greater intensity. but this is the normal condition. intuitive actualization is possible, but going through the gymnastics of cognitive understanding first seems the only way to bring back the operational authenticity of that intuition. either that or just get drunk with them all night, see who is the last standing.

I think what we need is critical consciousness. Critical consciousness towards the entire construct of technology. Technology is not neutral, it’s not God-given, it doesn’t come from the burning bush, it doesn’t emerge from the world of antimatter. It’s something that human society makes. So all of human society is inscribed in the machine in this sense – and then the machine becomes a force to reinscribe something on society. And you can have the negative aspect of this, and you can be truly creative – why not. I’m absolutely not denying anyone’s creativity. All I’m asking for, for myself, is critical consciousness about technology. — Hakim Bey

cheap flights

early morning departure. Frieder up hours before dawn as usual, Susi asleep. not too hard for me waking up. Light sleep on the before-travel night. some fast-moving image dreams that later skip-segue into closed eyes against the rising sun and the flashbacking shadows of trees flickering across rod-cone consciousness, triggering neuro-shock shivers to the system. icy streets have thawed after being salted. train on time. squeezed into my reserved seat by a large girl. two hours, change in Dortmund to the U-bahn, change in Apelebek to a bus, a short cold wait, arrive in plenty of time at the small airport. home to several of the extremely popular cheap airlines (https://www.germanwings.de, https://www.easyjet.com, https://www.wizzair.com, https://www.hla.de and https://airberlin.com) that are now flooding the Euro market. Prague for €UR40 (U$D48), could have gotten it for cheaper by €UR20 on different days. Cairo and a host of other Mediterranean destinations for €UR50. radical evolution in the market. probably won’t last too long — and might even be a strategy to get people accustomed to easy/frequent air travel, then stick them later. it is clearly having an effect on the Deutsche Bahn long-distance service and the legacy carriers. DB standard prices are extremely high, but they now offer quite some deals depending on the destination. Prague from Bremen was still €UR92 so I saved about €UR10 taking the train to Dortmund and flying. getting back will save me 50 €UR as I’m going to Köln: every little bit. in this corner of extremity and lack of fiscal consequence.

arrived, baggage somewhat delayed (the Lufthansa flight sharing the carousel was first). cold. catching the bus, focusing on the names being spoken by the automated announcer, I mistakenly got off three stops too soon and had to catch a tram to the Metro instead. duh. making connections, clean, crisp, fast. get to the National Theater, re-read the instructions. whoa, not a bad location. the security guard waiting for me, speaking rapid Czech. right on the river, center of the old town, across the street from the Theater, penthouse, the top floor of the Film Academy — for a view one has to poke a head out of the skyLights. sharing the very large five-room flat with a British screenwriter.

dark dreams

Of such great powers or beings there may be conceivably a survival… a survival of a hugely remote period when… consciousness was manifested, perhaps, in shapes and forms long since withdrawn before the tide of advancing humanity… forms of which poetry and legend alone have caught a flying memory and called them gods, monsters, mythical beings of all sorts and kinds… — Algernon Blackwood

drop by Galerie + to give Pálina some papers and to check out the show by Krístján Steingrimur, a former colleague of mine at the Art Academy, and the present Rector of the Fine Arts department. very direct work. intriguing were the samples of stuff (literally) from different locations (GPS/UTM-defined). reminded me of my sand collection. I had collected several hundred small round plastic pill-boxes filled in locations all around the world. then, at one point, during a move-related purge, I took all the samples and layered them in a one-liter pyrex lab bottle which looked great, sitting on my desk in my UNOCAL office. it wasn’t quite full, and I never sealed the top layer, so the first time it tipped over (when I was moving to Boulder from Santa Monica), all the beautifully colored and layered sands mixed to a bottle of uniform gray earth-stuff. so much for anti-entropic efforts.

body on the edge of crisis

hustle into town yesterday evening for some dance performances, with Aki doing one on the steps of the Atheneum to a composition “Everything but the city” by a young Dutch composer, Rijndert van Woudenberg. two other performances, one accompanied by a Stockhausen composition, the other by Henze, were ‘normal’ modern dance, and although there are probably a multitude of subtleties about the genre that pass the un-tuned eye, this normal dance is about the body and it’s forms and the parameters that body training apply to the possibilities of movement. clearly a difference between that and butoh.

I work with dance as it involves the changing of the senses. If your senses do not change, the dance does not change. The consciousness of the body comes into the picture with the changing of the senses. Generally we believe that in dance no matter what happens in our senses the physicality does not change. But to me, when the senses change, consciousness changes, and the physical body itself changes. In a bigger sense is the larger question: What is matter? So with sense and consciousness working together, the physical body itself does change, matter changes. — Kasai Akira

later, lunch with Sanna at Carousel. time and times. drifts through comfortable, warm places, once occupied, absorbed, diffused, permeated embodied be-ing, present, past, divided.

Cleveland Hopkins 1910 – 2003

Dad passes this evening. after this long struggle, and a long life. code blue, Janet calls, racing into the hospital. Nancy and Mom there, holding his hands. His heart couldn’t bear more time here. I am just home from school, exhausted. Stop what I am doing, and concentrate on a slender thread of consciousness. Light some incense. Crumble some sage harvested for just this purpose from the depths of Sand Canyon off the Yampa, press it deep into the palms, smelling the released sweetness. Burn some, the smoke mixing with the incense. An intuitive impulse says “write the time now.” on a 3×5 card, I write the time, 6:52. A call comes ten minutes later, he has passed. As birth is the surfacing, death is the submerging of soul back into its own, its transitory place. time shivers, small waves move outward, and the bardo of passing opens. Unmeasured intuition and connection. Still small voices, suspension of the material presence.
more “Cleveland Hopkins 1910 – 2003”

Leary

In planning a session, the first question to be decided is “what is the goal?” Classic Hinduism suggest four possibilities:

  • 1. For increased personal power, intellectual understanding, sharpened insight into self and culture, improvement of life situation, accelerated learning, professional growth.
  • 2. For duty, help of others, providing care, rehabilitation, rebirth for fellow men.
  • 3. For fun, sensuous enjoyment, aesthetic pleasure, interpersonal closeness, pure experience.
  • 4. For transcendence, liberation from ego and space-time limits; attainment of mystical union.

…snip…

Instructions for Vision 4: The Wave-Vibration Structure of External Forms (Eyes open, rapt involvement with the external visual stimuli, intellectual aspects)

O nobly born, listen carefully:
At this point you can become aware of the wave structure of the world around you.
Everything you see dissolves into energy vibrations.
Look closely and you will tune in on the electric dance of energy.
There are no longer things and persons but only the direct flow of particles.
Consciousness will now leave your body and flow into the stream of wave rhythm.
There is no need for talk or action.
Let your brain become a receiving set for the radiance.
All interpretations are the products of your own mind.
Dispel them. Have no fear.
Exult in the natural power of your own brain,
The wisdom of your own electricity.
Abide in the state of quietude.
As the three-dimensional world fragments, you may feel panic;
You may beget a fondness for the heavy dull world of objects you are leaving.
At this time, fear not the transparent, radiant, dazzling wave energy.
Allow your intellect to rest.
Fear not the hook-rays of the light of life,
The basic structure of matter,
The basic form of wave communication.
Watch quietly and receive the message.
You will now experience directly the revelation of primal forms.

— Timothy Leary, Ph.D., Ralph Metzner, Ph.D., & Richard Alpert, Ph.D. The Psychedelic Experience

Ah well, stumbled on that, following a thread from Aldous Huxley. As for the effort to shift awareness from a dominantly materialist point-of-view to one that has a central locus on an energized movement: I just had the realization that I probably will not ever produce a text-based representation circumscribing the territory of my own worldview. [ed: well, fast-forward to 2013 and my dissertation!] And unless in a situation where there can be an unfolding of the thoughts, in concert with an Other, there will be no revelation, no representation. Only action, doing, facilitating, and teaching. The 2126 class moves fast and with gusto. A deep difference with the spring class, where students seemed tight, fearful, and distracted. Just war? or, hmmmm, does it confirm or refute my theory that much education is about saturating individual, forming humans in a certain fear of non-conforming, while in-validating divergent behaviors and thoughts. How come I resist letting my child be wild?

<di>fusion 2003 over

<di>fusion is  over. Surely the last time I try anything like that at a US university. The system simply works against the nature of an open event, from the class schedules of the students to the rigidity of the technical infrastructure. It comes to a question of why the hell to even attempt to do what I do within these structures. Time to leave academia. Easter. Springtime in the Rockies, a phrase that I many times wrote to folks living here when I was away for those 12 years, in a wistful way. Wishing I could find a support mechanism here. Seems everywhere else it is possible, even easy, but here doesn’t work. Hmmmm.

And being passed by, over, through, even in my comfort: From artist studios in East Berlin to academies above the Arctic Circle, to offices in Manhattan, oil rigs in the Gulf of Mexico, and the millions of kilometers in steel- or alloy-skinned vehicles. All those territories, and nothing of socialized value comes from it. Cultivation of idiosyncrasy does not pay. Individual vision is not validated by dominant cultures. Or is that only what I perceive? That the individuality of vision obscures other possibilities directly before the eyes? We see what we want to see. In an eternally remixed society of malaise, negation, and imposed standards of be-ing. (Or are these sentiments merely what I want to see around me?)

And the baited consciousness, rising, rising, rising. While things are down, and language totally falters, it is nothing. It is the lubricant that greases the interstices of the social construct, making human-to-human juxtaposition tolerable.

blood of christ

sotto voce: The years drift by, suspended, swirling. Here in Crestone, standing, walking, sitting on the roots of the Blood of Christ mountains. An old Volkswagen goes by. Camping and wondering about everything. Watching self (over-consciousness. Trying to feel the place.) Leaving Colorado soon. Too soon. Sometimes a thought how to damn my connection to the Place. That I could move, complete, away, fully en-souled, but that does not happen.

raw suspicions

the raw suspicion that stability is a straw dog. (a term that Anthony first raised into my consciousness). in that conversation in a bar-restaurant somewhere on the Delaware River a long time ago. wondering what happened to him, no words from him in many, 18 moons ago. while now in the moment, the Leonids rain down from the sky. he was supposed to be going to Flagstaff, the wanderer that he is.

the last morning of the Media Lab workshop, I have something of a microscopic revelation in the number six tram. understanding that I am talking deeply about the power of presence as a creative strategy and practice, traveling around Europe preaching this, and all the while, at the same time, leaving my little boy behind. a little boy who is not so little anymore. everything seems impossible for this family. relationships are crushed and fragmented, distorted and removed, applied over distance and imbalanced. hmmmmmm.

another thread that came from the workshop this week were characterizations about the externalization of memory and the problem of re-presentation. with memory removed from the embodied self, there is an erosion of personal autonomy (the external localized memory is the technological network — which is not a network after all, but a lateral hierarchy). the act of placing memory externally reifies what would be an internally dynamic condition of evolutionary presence. and contributes to an ethical or even moral slide. (assuming that a static condition of memory is problematic — haven’t meditated on that one so much.)

here in Jyväskylä, dinner with Niina, finding out about the local situation (email never provides enough communications spectrum), in a hotel on campus by the lake. seminar tomorrow. a late call, like those many others, of the sadness I have caused to an Other. by not respecting innocence. and not providing the right dreams.

7-11

already settled. sort of. in a student dormitory, probably old enough to be the father of most of my neighbors. weird to be here. consolations come in the form of a high-speed connection in the small 30-square-meter (322 square feet) flat. shoe box, and expensive. one workshop done.

this arrives via the [7-11] list:

There are moments when all our mental and emotional powers are acutely heightened and seem suddenly to blaze with the bright flame of consciousness. At such times, as if overwhelmed by presentiment, a foretaste of the future, something prophetic is envisioned by the astonished soul, and one’s whole being longs to live, cries out to live, and the heart, inflamed with a blind, fervent hope, invokes the future, despite its mystery and incertitude, its storms and tempests, if only it be life. It was just such a moment for me. — Fyodor Dostoevsky

lunch with Mark

okay, already the system is declining. complete chaos in Hamburg. the Regional Express that Christian takes me down to in Kiel is delayed, stopping in Hamburg-Altona, so I have to race to the S-bahn to take that to the Hauptbahnhof. at first I choose the what I think is the wrong line, with several extra stops, but the most direct line is apparently completely shut down. make it to the station, racing to make the ICE to Berlin, only to find that it, too, is delayed by about 40 minutes. call Mark at the hotel, then race to another track which they announce with three minutes notice. on board the ICE, first class, full of German business types, swirling around and in between. I take an unreserved seat that has a power plug, much to the dismay of some others. settle in for the ride. more “lunch with Mark”

ignoring things

back to Kiel via Hamburg, on the train once again. having also once again not done much there at all except meet intensively with a small group of other humans and speaking, exchanging energies with them. ideas like forms of deep-praxis, life-changing practices, and ways of communicating my ideas in more visceral ways come up. and logistics, and that flow, analog and continuous, of life, forward, and the sensual information that feeds into that.

the music that I encoded at Wolfgang’s is quite electric/eclectic. like listening to KCRW radio. in Santa Monica. where eyes opened to other forms of thinking and being. about as experimental as you can get.

like having the students choose an energy source, and give weekly reports on it to the others. or, as arose in Kiel as well, that image of the two cans with a string between them. communications-at-a-distance.

hearing last night the depth of living under the weight of manifest fears in Bogota. how that goes deeply into re-arranging the body’s energy state. we may stand, consciously apart from the body, but eventually it comes back to connect with that removed consciousness. with a vengeance if it has been ignored too long. saying, DOn’t IGNORE THE LIMITATIONS OF SENSUAL PRESENCE, yep.

passing a massive antenna installation a bit the the north of the rail line. military, and probably extreme long wavelength array for submarine or global communications. a relic of the past? like the landstrasse lined with the Linden trees. and the fallow, wild fields. a higher level of wildness and disorder. than in the former West, still. nice.

decoding

this morning a step was taken, leading somewhere. away, towards. not clear, as mind is not clear, but the need to move toward clarity is not in stoking time so full of actions and opportunities to meet and greet with a long-term result of spreading consciousness over spaces so vast and convoluted that the totality of psychic and biologic energy is stretched thinner than the skin that holds meat and frame together. skins, surfaces, interfaces. creative action wells up, and the machine presses it into forms that do not release or flow. these times have been corrupted. following lines that are not straight, wending through secret geometries that are reflections of reflections of reflections of Silicon Dioxide mediations. this space here, text-mediated, papered, peppered with repeated and repeated structures. grinds itself to a standstill. constantly, and revives with each successive letter, comma, and line. the death of the text is in the interstices between words, between the minimal elements of its meaning. between the granularity of its sense. the death of digital is in the total vacuum of the interstices. the null set, the Dirac-delta function. zero-to-infinity in NO time. discontinuity. a mirror of life-cycles without the relief that they repeat. no illustrations to add smooth relief to this linguistic torrent. separated from cafe9.net as content coordinator. but the double scheduling of things just makes it impossible for me to do the job and it just didn’t work, like I have never walked away from anything. ever. but when the energy isn’t good, I do it. and indeed there has been a pearl of liberation buried deep in the act of walking away, gritting sand, grinding into flesh, and flesh responding with defense mechanisms of great beauty. the pearl is buried, though, so deep in the act, that for it to expunge itself, to surface in view, into ocular reception, life has to be lived with a slowness that is not a slowness of time, but a slowness of being. time is irrelevant. it is transcendence that must be surfaced without regard to social favor or safety or security or even presence. curvilinear. rectilinear. geometries. mechanics. quanta, critical media theory, the newest shows on teevee, software, code, code, DeCode. Loki arrives tomorrow, to visit me and his old haunts. well, me and Aaron, his best friend. he wants to hang out with both of us at the same time, wants me to get to know Aaron better. such a jewel a child can be. I busily try to re-map the spring to ensure regular times here in Iceland, strange to think of that. but it is clear for me that Loki needs his Pabby around at least some of the time. it can’t be all the time, and that makes my heart ache.

y2k

sporadic bottle-rockets, M-80’s, and strings of fire-crackers going off signals the approach of the New Years celebration in three short days. discussions do circulate on the condition of the world. and the possibilities of … but nobody knows anything for sure. so, speculation gets to be old and stale, and there is left only hollow waiting, which is, for me, a space of suspended living. there is no real breathless rushing towards doom. and portents are quite harmless, although they do pop into consciousness from time to time. waiting. letting fingernails grow, not calling folks. dinner last night with Val, Niels, Haukur, and Helmut, like the old times. Loki a few years older, eating, drinking, and talking. all of us older. me graying at the muzzle, look in the mirror, after pissing, behind amorphous silica eye covers, technology does not impact my being, only the body, or maybe it is vice-versa, maybe everything is changed with the advent of networked machines.

fracture!

it is clear that many people live in a world of mechanical or Newtonian causality, that there has been little popular progress beyond that model of thinking about the world. material substances are just that, objects rule.

These considerations force upon us the impression that the law of causality as a principle of natural science is one incapable of formulation in a few words, and is not a self-contained exact law. Its content can in fact only be made clear in connection with a complete phenomenological description of how reality constitutes itself from the immediate data of consciousness. — Hermann Weyl

the week flew by, two nights in Oslo, stayed at Hilde’s place, and so many things happened in that short time, thoughts can barely touch on half of them. a good, sincere seminar at the Academy of Fine Arts, with Kenneth, and hours spent talking with him. saw Janine (along with her daughter Anna) for the first time in 11 years. she had a couple works in the Fall Exhibition, so we met there for lunch before I tried one last attempt at shopping for something for Sanna met with the kunst.no (kunstnett) people, Erik, who Atle introduced me to, and Jøran, the Director. when first meeting Hilde — after the two delayed flights and the train in from the airport — I also met Cecelia, the Director of the Granum Kunstskøle where Hilde works. we were talking, she was in a hurry to get somewhere, and the conversation went on for some time about bi-cultural living, she having been raised partly in the US. finally she had to leave, and rushed out the door. a few moments later, the door buzzer rang, Hilde answered it and said ‘there’s been an accident.” so I followed her downstairs, and there was Cecelia lying on the sidewalk having seriously injured her ankle. there were a few people milling around, unable to act, it seemed, I knelt behind her to hold her up, she was in shock already, and in a lot of pain. it turned out to be multiple fractures and probably ligament damage, unfortunately. I got a bit angry with the people standing around. the fellows from the music store on the ground floor were just standing there, I yelled at them to call an ambulance, but they just stood there. another chap, just off the street, was trying to help, but it ended that Hilde had to go upstairs to call an ambulance. I didn’t have my mobile with me or I would have. the shock energy was too much for people, I guess. true, the ankle looked terrible, and I got a bit queasy when the paramedics arrives and started checking it out, but I didn’t understand why people were so helpless. shock is a weird thing, though. she was shaking, and trying to assemble things in her mind, and panicky. weird energy flow, to be sure. Hilde and I were both a little shocked by this intersection of energies.

09.09.1999, 09:09

9.9.99 come and gone, actually coming up to 0909 in a half hour. doom cometh (to them that waits for it…).

676. “But even if in such cases I can’t be mistaken, isn’t it possible that I am drugged?” If I am and if the drug has taken away my consciousness, then I am not now really talking and thinking. I cannot seriously suppose that I am at this moment dreaming. Someone who, dreaming, says “I am dreaming”, even if he speaks audibly in doing so, is no more right than if he said in his dream “it is raining”, while it was in fact raining. Even if his dream were actually connected with the noise of the rain. — Ludwig Wittgenstein

poor Louie, at his death bed, practically, dreaming about the rain, and writing about talking about what he might have been doing or thinking as it rains on him, in bed, dreaming of rain and dying.

body emulation

Sleep comes slowly, my right neck and shoulder are contorted by muscular contraction, internal stress mapping. From traveling, although the travel yesterday went totally smooth. And the situation here in Kiel seems to be absolutely optimal. And even the weather is pleasant. Where to take this text (raw self-consciousness is a worn-out policy). No skills available like Henry Miller had, no raucous sex and rampant depravity to denote. Appreciable way of going, and writing, yes, but as something to emulate, I ain’t got the writing skills. Exactly what are skills in writing? Organizing thoughts, ordered presentation of information, logical arguments, reasonable dialogues, uh, accurate pictures inscribed by words, (mind-states precisely mediated by language), descriptive flashes of brilliance, insight, comic diversion, poetry, what the hell is poetry? Can’t remember the last time I wrote a funny story, although I do tell such things frequently. Oh shit, orbiting egos and oscillating senses. Too much mind energy spent in communications with individuals. I need forays into mass communications. To grind down the specificity at which (where is the body?), well, weariness sets in. Boredom. As a state of bodily function.

info war

Made a lightning trip to Vienna, eating chocolate cake in a bag, Peter Brown called to say, you can make it okay, you can get married in Gibraltar near Spain, christ, you know it ain’t easy you know how hard it can be the way things are goin’ they’re gonna crucify me… — John Lennon

police recruits amble by the window looking very young. spend some time with Geert with others who are planning the next net-symposium for Ars Electronica, this one bearing the rather onerous theme of Info War which seems to be in the consciousness of many media theoreticians, pundits, and journalists.