easy come easy go

The disconnect from this j-o-b evolved quickly, and … easily, though with some angst in shifting the conversion of money to time rather than the reverse. After four years of 100% remote, 3.5 years office-bound before that, immersed in the cash-for-time schema, it comes down to the last day, spent mostly shuffling bytes. I did hear from a number of colleagues and one contractor who I worked closely with during the past year, which was nice, also the head of HR sent a pleasant note. She’d been very supportive when I was in deep conflict with the mindless, unimaginative, and utterly toxic prior management of the organization (thanks to her, I won that battle, seeing the asshole off into ignominious retirement a couple years ago!).

The only communications heard from my current boss the last week was “Have a nice weekend.” Late on Friday afternoon. Seemed a bit weird. He’s got plenty other stuff to deal with at the org. Oh well. Ça suffit!

That whole week was about shuffling data and information sets and writing procedural documentation that will likely never get used. Data acquisition, storage, and display has become an end in itself in many organizations: battling externally-applied standards (see the NGMDB‘s GeMS program), and the ever-present profit-motive of market-dominating libertarian vendors seeking to cash in on all steps of the process. At the same time, the binding of the data consumers into various platform ecosystems culls resources at the receiving end. Tired of addressing all the concerns around that. And what of the science that is supposed to be happening? It’s all the same: as the granularity of data acquisition increases, more and more energy has to be applied to organize and analyze the data. This side-tracks reflection, imagination, and even basic synthesis. The path from data to information to knowledge to wisdom is now largely externalized, rather than embodied. AI, the newest arrival in the fray, is injecting itself into the knowledge/wisdom process with a limitless ferocity given asymptotic CPU capacities and the vastness of the overall information space it is learning from. I will not look to AI for wisdom, only as a holographic representation of hubris.

Today is the second “work day” where I’m not working for someone else. My “mines.edu” email account is now defunct. That chapter of life mercifully over. It will take a bit of time to unwrap mind from all the noise that it’s been filled with over the past years. And to embrace what is to come. It’s happening, here, now. Conversations ensue with the network: Finland, Iceland, Germany, and points in between.

The next step, liquidating some assets so that they are more internationally portable: currency. The first big item, prepping and selling the Cedaredge house. Will have some documentation here so if you are looking for a quiet and dark-sky second home, a writing retreat, a plot of land to start a vineyard or apricot orchard, a base for some of the best Nordic skiing in the lower 48, or if you know anyone who might be … lemme know!

Integral to that will be the losing of accumulated stuff, so that the move back to the base in Arizona is less painful. Gotta get to work!

cognitive decline: ipse dixit, ‘cognoscere’

cognitive task, somewhere in Delta County, Colorado, February ©2021 hopkins/neoscenes.
Engaged in a cognitive task, somewhere in Delta County, Colorado, February ©2021 hopkins/neoscenes.

What was I thinking? Dunno. What am I thinking? Gone, in the instant that the next version of the monkey-brain is implemented through a core-dump. Reality? Relative, transitory. To know? A defunct notion.

As work-for-cash becomes an ever more complex burden of coaxing information from data: brain seizes, falters, forgets, fails. Colleagues exhibit various states of disconnect and disinterest in what they do. Is this a post-Covid malaise, or what? This while almost everyone else I know—acquaintances, friends, family—are feverishly traveling, hither and yon, while, simultaneously, the conditions for climate change accelerate. Both young and old, there seems to be no room for adjustment from the status of what we were, what we had, what we consumed before the world seemed to falter, shudder, and succumb to a systemic fever dream.

I can no longer maintain remote communications and time passes ever more swiftly. I do not see a solution. I can’t manage. The alienation is complete. I cannot even keep track of the scope of those folks who I have lost contact with. Did they make it through Covid alive?

A decade ago I was actively engaged in Europe after finishing up the PhD in Melbourne and following a couple semesters teaching at CU. That was the last time I was a salaried educator (in the US), with the exception of the many invites I got to participate as learning facilitator during the three months I was in Finland, Estonia, Germany, Netherlands, the UK, and elsewhere. Good times gone. What a difference a decade makes.

Any “spare” time is spent (oh, how I despise market terminology!) in the maintenance of the house and yard. Easier to deal with the yard. Any task that I can chant away. A random four-bar sequence playing on infinite loop in braincase while engaged in a repetitive task: the meditative potential is high when the incipient material state is predictable and easily grasped on the surface: the psycho-spiritual potential to change the world, significant.

This mental laziness keeps more complex house tasks at bay: computational, multi-step planning, considerations of material use, configuration, and possible errors. Stasis: when time accelerates. Rictus: is it fun yet?

Overall, this is an unsustainable situation. Somethin’s gotta give! But what, precisely?

work

Everything becomes work. First off, there is work-work, the cash-producing activity that resembles being at a cocktail party that your spouse’s ex invited her to, what the fuck was his name? You got dragged along. Yes, a non-zero possibility of having an interesting conversation on occasion, but then there are the unavoidable and stultifying and dysfunctional interactions more commonly encountered. There are surely better things to do in what has now become extremely limited life-time.

Then there is art-work, something that has generated minuscule quantities of cash over the years, though the peripheral effect of getting teaching jobs ostensibly because creative output can’t be ignored. But there’s no time to engage in the deep immersion that is required to produce, for example, sonic compositions. So art-work simply dries up. Archive gets occasional additions, but the process of mining the archive for material to feed the creative has ceased.

But all this is retrospect: what of the moment, this moment, where words are of no consequence, where words are empty, sightless, glazed eyes peering out from the memory of what once was on the page: what is now faded, erased. Yet, there is only the now, anymore, ever. The when of the past is only a weight to carry; the when of the future is someone else’s. Present conditions shrivel to the minimum: work-work to keep medical insurance and mortgage payments going while the mass of art-work falls to the floor, a gravitational insult to earth-bound body. No Lightness left in the creative endeavor.

Reminds me of old acquaintance Tom Sherman’s A Finished Work of Art is a Thing of the Past … or not.

Wind blowing gusts of snow on the far southern horizon: the San Juan Mountains. To the west the hulking mass of the Uncompaghre Uplift creates a false horizon, bending gravitational waves and forcing a second look, always.

where are we now?

Turbulence, chaos, confusion, extremity, consumption, inequality, decadence, decline, destruction.

What else is new? Are we sliding towards a self-induced eco-catastrophe or simply ‘evolving’ as a species? Are we, with our presumed intelligence and altruism, any greater than one singular expression of Life on this particular planet? Does Life deserve to be considered ‘special’? Or is it merely the way the cosmos (comes and) goes? Or is it all and everything?

What is to be made of the juxtaposition of science and spirit. Is spirit anything to construct a life around? Should spirit be considered when embodied and lived memory is so blinded and transitory? How is it possible to think of eternity when the immediacy of daily stress erases all dreams?

Do we misapprehend all the natures of ‘reality’? As we position ourselves, solid backs against solid walls: walls and backs that we assume are things to press against each other. The conundrum of ‘thing-ness’ a cruel lie in itself, over-arching our transitory nature. Dust unto dust. Any wall crumbles into, what?

Questions accumulate as life winds down into another fall, then winter: one future, spring in another place. Possibly. If fear can be eradicated from body-system. And the numbers look good.

And in mind, only jumbled fragments, nothing to hold to. Nothing to allow as meaningful, no construction of temporary artful expressions, nothing to bring fire to be-ing. Human encounters become so occasional, so distant outside of ‘work’, that they have no effect. Memory retains no imprint. Equinox brings no balance.

Death stalks Barcelona. Anthony goes silent. Thoughts wander to ancient Western road-trips: Death, and the many lively times sharing a space with him in Boulder. No word from Maite, she must be suffering terribly. Remote presence shows its cruel side, that mediated distance is not bridged.

changing up the trajectory

und so. Lots’a mulling over these past months, and the conclusion is that moving forward I will spend as close to 100% of my time [outside of the regular CGS workday] in proceeding to get on with my creative work. This means an end to what has anyway been an impoverished social life of the last year. Time is slipping, and in order to accomplish something, anything, before the clock runs out, the days of nomadic shuffling around to engage with folks f2f are over, gone. Much life-time was spent in this pursuit over the years, but now, the archive calls, to be reassembled, reconfigured, simply maintained, fwiw: there is certainly no worth in it residing in boxes. Hundreds, thousands of vintage silver prints, slides, negatives, tapes moldering away in boxes. And I need to spend the time in getting works out, or something. The bulk of my creative production went into that personal network, and it seduced me into thinking it was a sustainable pathway. It was not. It brought me to the miserable situation that I am in now. I see this reflected in every postcard of mine that I run across. A piece of my life-time/energy spent in the desperate drive to remain connected. more “changing up the trajectory”

one year down, ?? to go

A year has passed of life, of work. This year defined mostly by the constrictions imposed by the j-o-b. There are still days where I would rather drive my truck to the airport and board a flight to Berlin to resume a more creative life. A fear-of-future precludes that, and the knowledge of that fear itself eats away at what little creative mojo is still existing in belly.

There were some jarring interjections to this diminished life: several inspiring, electric, disturbing human encounters, and as a sparkling counterpoint, ripping through to the root of the lizard brain, the eclipse. Nothing like a jolt of totality to bring presence into being. Otherwise, creative production contracts to flaccid efforts that lack mindfulness. Something must be done.

Je suis ma propre muse

or tu ne es pas ma muse

or je suis amusé par ma propre muse étant

or ma muse précédente ne me divertit

or muse amusante, disparue

or muse amusante, parti, je m’amuse

yes, that’s it. back to the steady-state of being, for a change. At least I’ll be able to get *some* work done!

A dolorous combination of caprice along with my own inability to temper reactions to horrific stories of past abuse — perhaps the subtext of an upcoming novella or multi-media work exploring how humans can say anything and how their words needn’t be connected to actions of consequence: hardly moving the neurons necessary to produce diaphragmatic contractions and subsequent guttural exhalations. Talk is cheap. Lived life is the ultimate test of … life and, consequently of heart.

six months in

Apocalypsis cum Figuris, Nr. 4, The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, Albrecht Dürer

[Already] ’cause time is going so fucking fast. Happened that I got a migraine the same day, so had to take my first day of sick leave. Uuh, important factoid? Nah. Glazed eyes, with four monitors at the desk, workin’ for ‘the man’ 8-5 (with a chunk of extra hours already accrued), M-F, many days a year. Woe is me (as in Dürer’s Apokalypse argh). Life-time simply melts away. And though this is Life, it never seems so. Life is elsewhere, except when fully immersed in a natural system (could that be my, or someone else’s navel? s’pose so). Better yet, simply immersed in sensing the sky devoid of skyworms, the land devoid of vehicles, houses, and foot-prints, devoid of pathways, suffused with chaos, no invisible armature holding it all together, flying free.

Work: comprised of back-end organization of the CGS data-space. The digital data-space has had no comprehensive oversight or consistent management since the advent of the digital office itself. Terabytes of data has accumulated without regard to searching, utilization, or archiving. Of course, all this takes resources which the CGS hasn’t had much of. I have taken several small portions of that data-space and am intensively re-organizing them as consistent, searchable, and public-facing resources. As the organization exists to provide information to the public, it is essential that it has a work flow that proceeds from the professional geoscience research directly into formats that augment the public role. So, a key question is how to make that translation from scientific data and information to public information and knowledge.

Colorado Geological Survey website; bookstore; the new blog I just implemented; Twitter feed @COGeolSurvey; and Facebook page. Nothing active on Instagram as there is already a dearth of usable visual material. I am well into taking the entire website, bookstore, and blog situation (more than 2000 pages of stuff – GIS data, maps, reports, forms, publications, information, images, and some videos) and melding that into a single WordPress site that will piggyback on an in-progress web re-tooling that Mines is doing concurrently. File naming conventions, directory structures, metadata strategies, editing of texts and visuals, whilst implementing and monitoring a wide range of analytics to get accurate information about the 1-to-2-thousand visitors a day that the site gets. And so on.

cryptic and incomplete 2016 review

I think 2016 started with the thought that it couldn’t be more challenging than 2015. If change is a challenge, 2016 definitely was that.

It started out slowly, ensconced in the modest house I bought in Prescott in 2014 that contained my full art-media-production studio and archive in Prescott, Arizona. As the art-scene in Prescott consists mostly of bronze cowboys, turquoise-and-silver jewelry, and paintings of blue-eyed Indian children, my work had to be virtual and remote: Patrick of framework:afield invites a piece for his internationally syndicated weekly program on field recording; Arts Birthday; AudioBlast; Reveil 2016; continuing contributions to aporee::maps; and, later, Radiophrenia (Glasgow). Portrait work continues but I haven’t really put any new landscape images online for awhile.

One local exception came when Tom, the director of the Natural History Institute invited me to do a public lecture and workshop on ‘acoustic ecology’ titled “A Natural History of Sound” in March.

April saw something of a (Plotner) family conclave for Al’s interment at the Antelope Hills cemetery. I was the sole representative from the Hopkins/MacKenzie side of the family. Good to see those folks again, might be awhile before the next family-type conclave.

I spent significant time the past couple years on a conceptual re-development of the Ecosa Institute‘s ‘regenerative design’ curriculum with a small group of folks along with volunteer work at the nascent Milagro Art Center. more “cryptic and incomplete 2016 review”

official: get in touch

bidness cards arrive, officially existing, Golden, Colorado, October 2016

I did have them alter the design, though, so that all three entries — telephone, email, and web are in a single column instead of two … oh yeah, and my email is jchopkins, too. and… we may be altering the CGS logo at some point in the not-too-distant future. So these cards might become redundant. I do like the retro look of the CGS logo, but it doesn’t lend itself to a consistent palette for branding/design work… we’ll see.

end of week 2

Saturday. Survived another week, this one five days. Pacing myself, or attempting to. Many conversations: saw Marv Kay, the former football coach at the CSM Foundation offices; lunch with a Bolivian exchange student coming from Montanuniversität Leoben in Austria for a semester in Petroleum Engineering at CSM; a 90-minute briefing on the rules for using a ‘Procurement-card’ for purchases; a 90-minute briefing on the various health plan benefits; meet with Rick for a beer at the Mountain Toad; Friday at the Denver Gem & Mineral Show working the CGS booth with Debbie, talking to a lot of school children about geology and rocks, interesting; a lecture over in Berthoud Hall by Peter Barkman, the Senior Hydrogeologist at the CGS; another meeting of the CERSE (College of Earth Resource Sciences & Engineering) support staff (I’m the only alum and male in the room of 20 people!); interacting with other drivers on the 35-minute commute twice a day; walking to campus (takes 15 minutes each way, passing the heavy construction at the 6th Avenue/19th Street intersection — a pedestrian walkway for students is part of the plan); looking around Golden, absorbing the changes to the demographic and economic status quo.

road construction, 6th and 19th, Golden, Colorado, September 2016

end of week 1

The theater of the ‘working world’ — as random humans come together in earnest efforts to optimize the success of some shared and cooperative activity — this becomes my reality. Sacrificing personal life-time in service of the social, in recognition that social cooperation will/should ultimately convert into individual viability. The unfathomably deep internal desire to … live … is the energized basis for all social collectivity. Social structures persist through shared efforts that collectively move along a single trajectory. The trajectory determined by initial conditions as much as the social contingencies that follow.

hard core: worm farms?

Third week of hard labor down. “Churching-up” the house in Todd’s lingo. If the churching-up will bring some equity return, then gawdammit, I’m in! Except for aching hammer-struck fingers, sun-burned eyes (in the +95F sun), dehydration, and crazed physical multi-tasking… Making piles for charity, piles for the library, piles for the land-fill, piles for recycling, piles for the Natural History Institute, piles to take to Boulder, piles to store for awhile, piles to store for less than a while, Home Depot shopping lists, argh! It will all be over in 3.5 weeks. Anyone need a nice worm farm??

preparations…

The blog showing the lowest monthly readership in years. Hardly any new content. Time focused on the house, and packing the studio up. Five days of exterior work sees major progress, still one window on order, some polyiso insulation panels, followed by OSB siding, painting, then trim, finishing the interior window framing, cleaning, patching all walls, painting the interior, new gravel on the upper and lower driveways.

You want a nice ‘cabin-in-the-pines’? $220,000. Close to town, but in a secluded area, accessible via two dead-end roads. Great neighbors, nice yard that has been rain-catchment landscaped, ready for a large cistern system that would make it H20-net-zero. Definitely things I won’t be able to finish, though, before splitting for Colorado, but we’ll see.

Technical Media Specialist

Enough said:

Colorado School of Mines invites applications for the position of Technical Media Specialist.

The Colorado Geological Survey serves the State of Colorado to ensure that the citizens of Colorado gain most efficient use of and economic benefit from geological resources, while maximizing their protection from geological hazards. Education and research programs affiliated with CGS are enhanced through close collaboration with the strong departments in the College of Earth Resource Sciences and Engineering: Economics & Business, Geology & Geological Engineering, Geophysics, Liberal Arts & International Studies, Mining Engineering, and Petroleum Engineering.

Colorado is well-known for its quality of life and outdoor lifestyles. Mines is located in Golden, Colorado, in a scenic valley at the foothills of the Rocky Mountains. Mines has enrollment of over 5,400 students in undergraduate and graduate degree programs in engineering and applied science. The metropolitan Denver area, with its cultural and sports activities, is located a few miles to the east of Golden. The climate is continental with gentle summers and occasional snow in the winter. There is a major international airport within 35 miles of campus. For more information visit us at: https://www.mines.edu.

Responsibilities: The Technical Media Specialist writes press releases (for what ‘press’?), prepares information for the media (who’s that?) and is responsible for posts/tweets to social media outlets (?), including tracking social media influence measurements. Writes clear and compelling website content (yup), including articles, product descriptions, e-newsletters, blog posts, and podcast scripts. Researches and writes annual reports, newsletters, pamphlets, and other print materials. Works with technical staff to improve document quality, usability and relevance. Other duties include researching material, managing outreach events and agency website, and coordinating content reviews with senior staff. The position assists with general office administration duties and other duties as assigned.

Mines is an Equal Opportunity/Affirmative Action employer and educator that recognizes that diversity is crucial to its pursuit of excellence in learning and research. Mines is committed to developing student, faculty, and staff populations with differing perspectives, backgrounds, talents, and needs and to creating a richer mix of ideas, energizing and enlightening debates, deeper commitments, and a host of educational, research, and service outcomes. As such, Mines values candidates who have experience working in settings with individuals from diverse backgrounds. Minorities, women, veterans, and persons with disabilities are strongly encouraged to apply.

Qualifications: A bachelor’s (MFA) degree in journalism, communications, digital media or a closely related field is required (CHECK). Other requirements include strong writing and editing skills (CHECK); applicants must be able to write clearly, succinctly and in a manner that appeals to a wide audience (CHECK). Must be proficient in the use of Adobe Create Suite, Adobe Creative Cloud or similar print, web content management and digital publication software (CHECK). Applicants must demonstrate, or show evidence of, excellent written, oral communication and interpersonal skills (CHECK). Must be able to take complex, technical information and translate it for colleagues and consumers who have nontechnical backgrounds (CHECK).

Preference will be given to applicants who possess:

• A master’s (PhD) degree in journalism, communications, digital media, or a closely related field (CHECK)

• A bachelor’s degree in geology, geological engineering, engineering, geography, soil science, or a closely related field (CHECK)

• Expert knowledge of social networking channels, web design, HTML and search engine optimization (CHECK)

• Experience working with audio/visual production equipment and other multimedia tools used to distribute podcasts online (CHECK)

• Knowledge of technical subjects such as geology, geological engineering, engineering, geography, soil science, or a closely related field (CHECK)