Run out of words to express, to exhale what is in me head. Time passed into histories and time again, but no words form that reflect the interior dia/monologues. Only noise. The only measure over time has been to listen to the Other to see if there is something understandable. I have seen many messages expelled from inside Others, messages that I recognize [empathy?], and can find rooted presence in my own being. But where is MY voice? Not talking about effect, affect on the immediate environment, but more the reverberations, resonances. If I believe my own statements: that all things are inter-connected, then there is no doubt of affect, but what is the measure of it and in what way is it manifest in the Other. To look for it in the Other — via that whole pattern of how one looks at the Other — is built up from childhood, how one reflects on the being of the Other. Patterns of reaction, response, actual ways of seeing, viewpoints, impressed into psyche until they become the reified structure of the ego. Living life by the ego. Hmmmm.
Impinging signals are too quickly attenuated by these learned (imposed) filtering mechanisms. Filtering (as a model of the perceived limit for action) seems to be a direct function of what psychologists (and Buddhists) call the Ego. How to avoid, deactivate, or otherwise re-route sensual information around that system? Let it flow! (If systems analysis even offers a potential model for approaching the situation). But this is the primary problem. Finding the language, the system for attacking/dealing with incoming and outgoing energies in a way that follows the nature of the energies themselves.